


Awkward Locker Room Interactions

by KennysMagicDog



Category: South Park
Genre: Fluff, I don't write often, I'm just bored, Implied Stendy, Kyle is rlly tall, M/M, Random bully character, cute shit, this might suck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-01-25
Packaged: 2019-10-16 05:53:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17543945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KennysMagicDog/pseuds/KennysMagicDog
Summary: Basically Kenny gayly talks to Kyle about a dumb school dance and Kyle beats the shit out of a fat kid that's a little less racist than Cartman.





	Awkward Locker Room Interactions

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all this is my first time posting on AO3 don't mutilate me in the comments please. Nah jk do whatever you want

It was just a normal day in the locker rooms. Normal normal-

Oh hello.

"Hey Kyle!" I waved obnoxiously at the redhead. While staring. At his ass. Very obviously. He turned to face me as he was changing into a maroon flannel and jeans. He doesn't wear his hat every day anymore, and he has a super cute haircut. Pretty short in the back and really fluffy up front. "Hey Ken, what's up?". Jesus, he is super tall. When did that happen? He fucking grew overnight, like Jack and the Beanstock type of bullshit while I'm sitting here at an astonishing 5'6 and a half with greasy ass hair. But hey I cut some of it so that's a plus, at least I don't look like Shaggy from Scooby Doo.

"Oh! I've been meaning to ask, who's the lucky lady that's going to the dance with you?" I smoothly asked.  _Flawless. We got em._

He looked uncomfortable. Oops. 

"Uhm- why?" He peeped, turning the lightest shade of pink. Cute.

"Well, I haven't seen you ask anyone yet, I was just curious." I managed to hide my dumb smile that I always get around him.

"Oh so now you're stalking me? Didn't know you were so _infatuated_ with me, McCormick." He said, awfully pridefully. Dick.

I shot back, "Stop avoiding the question! I know where you live-" I was cut off by him yelling. "OKAY! I'm not taking anyone! Happy now?" Well, I already knew that but I got you to admit it. I love pissing him off. Cartman was right, it's super fun.

"Ok good, neither am I. We can go together, what pet names do you like?" I assured him. No more lonely Broflovski- "That's really gay." He interjected. My thoughts, that is. "I prefer 'Sugar' but that works too." I pestered. 

"Are you trying to swoon me or commit suicide?" Oh getting feisty I see!

"Any death is a good death if it's by the hands of a 6 foot tall ginger-" 

"I'm 5'11." He so rudely interrupted. 

"Close enough!" 

"Anyway, what flowers do you want me to bring on our 'date'?" The ginger asked. I thought for a second. "Oh, straightforward I see. First, you have to help me pick out a dress." I replied smartly. He turned pink again, "Yeah, right. The only dresses you like are the rediculous Cinderella ones." Hey! I flipped my hair and turned dramatically, crossing my arms, "Well! Fine. I'll just go by myself." I heard a chime behind the two of us.

Our little chit-chat was on hold once someone got into our field of vision.

A chubby guy approached us looking red and gross. He was definitely gonna cause trouble, I could already tell. "Hey! Would you two fags tone it down, I'm trying to change over here!" The guy said, neither of us were very phased considering we heard stuff like that from Cartman on a daily basis. This was just another asshole wanting to pick a fight. This could have happened another time though! Ew, he was all sweaty. Kyle immediatly responded, already prepared to shoot fire. We all have tons of fat kid roasts from being friends with Cartman for so long.

"I don't think we're the problem here, tubby. Better recheck the size of your shirt." And then I almost fell down from laughing so hard. God dammit, Kyle.

"Rich, coming from a real life Slenderman." The chubby guy said affirmatively.  _Cocky._

Kyle looked as unamused as ever, I don't blame him. "At least I don't try to eat my clothes before I put them on." Still deadpanning. I couldn't stop laughing, I wish I could have recorded this. "What's the _hick_ laughing at?" Once I heard that I went silent. _That_ got my attention for sure.

Kyle's eyes went wide as his brows furrowed and I could see the tips of his ears turn red, staring daggers at the kid. Uh oh. 

"What the fuck did you just say?"

"Just asking why your imbred friend is laughing so hard, when he can barley even speak English-" he was cut off by Kyle punching him straight in the nose. After the loud crack that was heard, blood came rushing down the guy's face, falling unconscious within seconds. He fell onto the floor drenched in a dark red puddle of his own diabetic blood, it was graphic but nothing I wasn't used to. I wasn't even disturbed about Kyle being able to knock out a guy with one hit, that was kind of expected, I was more concerned about being called imbred.

I looked down. _Imbred_? Why did that sting so much?

Kyle walked back over to me next to the lockers. "Come on Ken- Kenny?" Straight away noticing how much the comment hurt and his face softened. I stuttered, "Kyle...d-do I look imbred?" I asked, rather dumbly.

"Oh my God- if you looked in any way imbred, how would you be getting laid so much?" Kyle questioned, a little irritated. 

"But-"

"Stop being fucking stubborn. No, you don't look imbred. I think you look really cute-" he cut himself off quickly.

I guess.

 _Wait- wait_...

"You think I'm cute?" I started to smirk my mood going back up, haha caught him. " _Platonically_!" He 'corrected'.

I shot up, and pointed at him triumphantly, "HA! I caught you red-handed, Broflovski!"  _This is gonna be fun._

He shyly responded, turning from a light pink to crimson. He punched my arm playfully, it kinda hurt. "Oh shut the fuck up." 

"I'll keep that in mind as we slow dance under the spotlight." My smartass tested. Tested to perfectly I might add, "God dammit- you fucking suck."  _Trapped. All you have to blame is yourself on this one, Ky._

"Already? I thought you'd at least take me to dinner first!"

He angrily stated as a **fact**  and pointed at the knocked out kid, "Keep it up and you'll end up like tubby over there." 

_Point taken._

We finally got out of the nasty locker rooms, only to realize school has been over for about half an hour I wonder what would happen to the fat kid. I was still kind of hurt by the imbred comment, but thank God for subject changers. And Kyle. It was kind of sweet how he beat up the kid when he started talking about me. I felt my face heat up thinking about it. A smile crept over my lips. I've never seen him be so protective over anyone..but it was platonic.  _Right?_

I glanced at Kyle who was already looking at me as we walked in sync. Did he just watch me smile like an idiot?

"What's up with you?" I cued. He turned as red as me.

"Nothing.. just thinking." He piped. His eyes sparkled while they glazed over me. Once we were off campus he stopped.

Kyle grabbed my shoulder before I marched back to my house.

"Ken, I have something to do before you go." I thought for a moment, confused.

I mumbled out a 'what is it' before he turned me around to lift my face up and grace his lips over mine, then lock it with a soft kiss.

I was shocked, if felt like there were hornets in my stomach. I kissed him back, lifting myself up with my hands on his shoulders. I melted with each second passing by. I didn't think. Couldn't think. I felt him lift my hood off and run his fingers through my hair.

He ended it to look at me and smile so sweetly it could give you diabetes, and with hazel eyes sparkling like fireworks. He didn't even need to talk to let me know what he thought. Shortly after he let go to walk ahead of me, and I just stood there. Paralyzed and red, if I had been a cartoon I'd have hearts for eyes. What do I do now? I watched him walk in the distance. Disappearing into the light fog that was forming. Now I know what Stan felt like for Wendy. 

But I'm gonna get him back for that one.

 

**The end.**

**Author's Note:**

> I'm now realizing this is super fast paced and a mess- but it was just practice. Also the title seems so familiar but I can't put my finger in it


End file.
